I have returned to blogging. After months of disgust, a hard heart, worldly desires and just general contempt, God has pressed my heart to rediscover my 1st love. I have turned far from God over the last few months if not years and it's time to have the zeal I had when I first believed. I want the fire that burned in me and I pray it will never be extinguished.

I had originally decided to start a new blog, but I'm still the same person I was when I started blogging, but my thoughts towards God have still been focused on him. If scoffers and mockers want to come back and pierce my heart over and over again, pointing out all my character flaws, then so be it.

I haven't decided what I want to do with this blog in its entirety but the fact I am returning to write about God, Jesus, the cross and all the things being impressed on my heart, I figure it is a good start.

Hypocrisy is a Wonderful Thing:

The wonderful thing about having a blog and being open about it is all the wonderful scrutiny and criticisms that come about in your life. For example, my wife posted on her blog about how we do not celebrate halloween in our family and will not let her go to a pumpkin patch with her school, and that let open the floods gates from everything about how we are making her the odd kid to how hypocritical we are.

This got me thinking a little bit. Yes, we are hypocrites and because the comments make it painfully aware that we are it should point to only one thing. No matter where we are in our lives, no matter how long we've been down the road, or searching for the road, we all need the mercy and salvation of Jesus Christ. Even Christians falter from time to time and it takes a very special breed of people to point that out and for that I am grateful. The truth is, even the most "seasoned" Christian can succumb to worldly desires and ideals, and the open criticisms, though seemingly cruel in intent, help us to become a more godly family. Thank Mr/Mrs/Miss anonymous for bringing it to our attention that we need to be focused on Jesus and the wonderful gift of salvation by dying on the cross for our sins, because we still sin today and will most likely sin tomorrow. Now we have the power to change what we didn't see before so we may live more Godly lives. I can't thank you enough.

I was thinking about the ten commandments and how I've broken 9 out of 10 laws, which I thought was pretty good all things considered when God laid it on my heart that in the spirit of the Law, I've broken all 10 of them. And I'm thinking to myself, I've never murdered anyone. And to which God responded, "But you have thought maliciously against your brother haven't you?" To which I had to respond, "yes."

To think about the law in the spirit in which it is intended is harsh. To realize that you are no better than the thief and murderer crucified with Jesus. To think that my thoughts carry just as much weight as action is truly a heavy responsibility. Nothing I write is new information nor a new thought, but one that has been reiterated time and again in the bible. It gives me an incentive to guard my heart in every thing I say and do. It tells me not to let my thoughts stray from that which is holy and righteous. To entertain evil is the same thing as action on that thought. It says a lot about the moral compass we are to exhibit to the outside world in thought, action, and deed.

I am a sinner and have broken every law of God set before us. For that I am condemned as a sinner to death and separation from God. But because I have confessed with my lips, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in my heart, I shall be saved from the disparaging gruesomeness of the pit. If I have sinned against any of my fellow brothers or sisters in faith, I am truly sorry and I'm willing to make any amends necessary and ask for forgiveness. Forgive me becuase of my selfishness, arrogance and prideful actions.

Help me to become a stronger person in faith. Help me to break the chains that have held me captive for so long in my life. I need to find a partner of accountability in the area of pornography, since I'm a guy after all. Help me to live a righteous life and renew my faith as in days past.


Jim Brank

Two comments since my grandfather's death have left me rattled and rightly so. I often think about him and his life in general did seem representative of the christian life and that I cannot argue. Still, I have never heard any profession of faith from his lips or anyone that knew him closely. How can I say a man died a christian without knowing the whether the most crucial part of it all even happened. Without an assurance that he confessed, "Jesus is Lord." and believed in his heart that God raised Jesus from the dead (Romans 10:9), I cannot say with any certainty the man died a christian. I can hope he made a profession of faith before his final day, but I'm not always sure he did.

Before this, I had always doubted my parents salvation, but now I am sure of their faith. You know, faith without works is dead (James 2:26). Faith and action are integral to each other and living the Christian life without professing it is just as meaningless.

Tell me how you know he died a Christian, and I'll retract everything.

Hooray!!!

After two weeks of down time due to a bad hard drive (2nd time from Seagate in a month!!!!) and am back up and running. I'm worried about the quality at Seagate despite their warranty (5 yrs) since their acquisition of Maxtor, the sorriest excuse for a hard drive manufacturer in my opinion. I hope this doesn't affect my opinion of the company because I still have Barracuda II, III and IV's that work and many have been running for 5 years of more. Still it's good to be back on my computer instead of my wife's laptop.

Why I don't eat pork. Part 1

We got our cable internet connection fixed. It was averaging 200 kbps download as of late and with a new modem we are averaging about 2400kbps. We've had our old modem for about 3 years and a failure now was inevitable, but it sure did last well. Now we don't have problems with dropped internet connections and sporadic failures.

Which is worse?

A pastor faking it or a congregation that can't tell the difference?

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hooray

We now have a wireless G network connection.

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