My life is a struggle between things carnal and things spiritual. It seems I am caught up in a superficial torrent with no chance of survival. In my heart I know my redeemer has everything under control, yet I feel disheartened. I feel I can no longer contain the rage that eats at my very being. In the desire to provide for my family both physically and spiritually, I feel this world will destroy me. At every turn it seems there is another mishap which keeps my flesh from doing what's in my heart. My heart belongs to the people, the poor, those in need and at every instance I have to place the needs of my family and self above this. No longer does it seem I am doing the will of God but trying to fufill my selfish desires. I have told my wife of the things I think are mistakes but have "bitten my tongue" for the sake of taking the easy way out instead of relying on God. No longer will this happen. It has been shown time and again my parents decisions on many matters are wrong spiritually. In the physical world, they work fine but I am not, or at least should not be, ruled by the physical world. I need to walk by faith again and not by my senses. My senses fail me at every turn but the Word and Voice of God have yet to fail me. I hope I walk the way I should from now on.


Jim Brank
Servant